Sometimes, a dream will really stick with you.
I don’t remember exactly what sparked the invitation from God to play chess with him. I feel like he was suffering from boredom in much the same way that a spoiled child does. Nothing is satisfying when everything is available. Anyway, the point is God asked me to hang out and play chess with him. The God in my dream was played by the monologuist Spalding Gray, sitting behind a desk in a dimly lit room with a spotlight on the chessboard in front of him. He had an intensity to him as he repeatedly kicked my ass. Like, he beat me at chess in every way possible. He seemed happy for the company. I’m guessing that most people didn’t stand for God not giving them a chance, and quit. I mean, the creator can see every move, right? He can squash your game in a minute, or drag it on like a cat “playing” with a mouse. (Cue chess playing time lapse montage against the background of the Universe here)
There are too many possible ways to win at chess to calculate exactly. The number of possible chess games is so large that it is estimated to be more than the number of atoms in the observable Universe. (Hence the montage - eons of playing in the blink of an eye, without aging.)
This dream was before cell phones, but I imagine if it were to take place today God would be distracted by his phone at this point. There is only so much satisfaction available from repeatedly pummeling your opponent, even if it is a lesson. Kicking my ass at chess no longer had his full focus. So that is when it happened. God was all up in his head, thinking about other shit, and I beat him. When he finally paid attention and realized what had happened, he flew into a rage.
So… here I am with a pissed off God, who is done hanging out and is going to drive me home. Good times! Fucking God drives like a crazy bastard! Scary as hell, kind of like the scene in Scrooged with David Johansen as the Ghost of Christmas Past, making some clearly unlawful and otherworldly maneuvers. I am white knuckling it hanging on, fucking terrified when finally we reach our destination. (Thank God does not seem like the appropriate remark at this point)
God didn’t speak during the drive, I believe he was focused on creating a terrifying experience for his passenger. Seriously well executed. Nicely done. Way to go God. I uncurl my fingers from the oh shit handle and unlock my seatbelt still trembling a bit, ready to make my exit.
God, with both hands still on the steering wheel turns his head slowly to look at me and says:
“Just because you know how to win doesn’t mean it is the right thing to do.”
I nod, get out of the car, he waits and watches until I get inside safely before pulling away, with a smile on his face.
By repeatedly being open to failing you learn how to win. Whatever “winning” means. The point is here to keep your eye on the prize, there are countless ways to get there. You don’t know what’s gonna happen.